Why Obama Will Lose

It is the 31st of July 2008. McCain has just played the race card.

1. Obama will lose because when white voters get in the privacy of the voting booth they will revert to their true color. Gallup and the other public opinion surveys have been wrong before. People will lie and tell a pollster anything.

2. Hispanic voters will go over to McCain because McCain will go pronunciar un discurso in Spanish in which he promesa to make español lengua oficial de los Estados Unidos.

3. People refuse to believe that Obama is a Christian despite his own statements that he believes in Jesus Christ and despite the fact that not one reporter, not even "journalists" from Fox "News", has been able to document evidence to the contrary. Even tabloid reports like Inside Edition admit and state unequivocally that Obama is a Christian. McCain, on the other hand, was not even born in the USA. This all goes to demonstrate that Americans are stupid (the USA has never had the highest average national IQ), ignorant (unaware that there are Christian Arabs and Christians even in Saudi Arabia, and that Obama is not an Arab nor a Muslim), and foolish (resistant to facts, superstitious about names). America is an anti-intellectual nation that feels that being a brainless mook is a good thing. [As an American, I eat a brain food diet; try to learn things, and try, with limited success, to correct my own thinking]

4. The Ku Klux Klan will get out the vote for McCain.

5. Because McCain is the Bush third term, George Bush, who is best friends with the Bin Laden family, will get Osama to do something scary the day before Election Day so that people will vote for John McCain. "You can't change horses in the middle of a stream after all." I heard this nonsense from a lifelong Democrat as her reason for voting for Bush instead of Kerry.

6. Just by being black, a black person plays the race card even if they don't open their mouth. White people don't have this kind of stress and hypertension put on them because a newspaper or radio news report does not identify them as white. That is always assumed unless one states otherwise. TV and news magazines with color photographs show the color of a person's skin. Whenever a black person is mentioned in news reports, their color is always identified. Young people are less likely to mention a person's color when they inform their parents that they are inviting over some friends. McCain, an old diehard, comes from a past age when color was why you held people back. In John McCain's dinosaur world of fission, oil and coal, it is impossible for a black person to not play the race card. In his twisted logic, the mere fact of being black is playing the race card.

7. Young people will show up at rallies but historically young people won't show up on Election Day to vote. They don't know where their precinct is. They don't know where to cast their ballot. On the day after the election, they suddenly remember they spaced it out completely. So many young people don't read the newspapers or watch the news. Even if they remember and manage to get to a polling place, it is the wrong one. They don't have their card or drivers license. Their name is not listed on the rolls because they never registered to vote. It is a neurological fact that most young people lack a fully developed frontal lobe in their brains which is why they don't prepare ahead of time or look ahead to the consequences of their inaction. It is why they will not be there when Obama needs them the most.

8. A woman wearing too much red lipstick will rig the vote in Florida. Last time every black person in Florida was classified as a felon ineligible to vote. This time every black person in Florida will be classified as insane and, under conservatorship, ineligible to vote. Or no one paid their taxes or they are misidentified as illegal aliens. Nothing incenses black people more than disenfranchisement. Has something to do with over five (500) hundred years of struggling to get the vote. One group of Republicans wonders why Blacks don't trust them. A second group of Republicans know why and just don't care. A third group of Republicans are the ones rigging the vote: owners of voting machine companies, voting software companies, and voter database companies are Republican. A fourth group of Republicans see all this, they are disgusted, and they join Republicans for Obama but not in numbers enough to make a difference.

9. When a white politician is perceived as racist, it does not hurt him or her in the primaries or general election. In fact, a racist image helps them in the South and other places. When a black politician is perceived as even slightly critical of white people, he or she is finished politically. Their career is over. Even if they are in an all-black district and have no white campaign contributors or donors.

10. The Electoral College will, as usual, thwart the will of the people. Hillary said the Electoral College should be abolished. Black people prefer Hillary. Black people have noticed, more than most that the Electoral College is just another way to gerrymander.

11. Fox will declare McCain the winner before the polls even open and the other networks will lemming-like go along with their decision.

12. The politicized Supreme Court will select a Republican president in a close election.

13. Hillary's most virulent supporters are old white woman who distrust Obama because their mother always told them that it is bad luck when a young black cat crosses their path. But seriously, they would rather wreck the Democratic Party, go over to the anti-choice Republicans, and cut off their own noses to spite their faces by jumping in bed with the Enemy. Feminists are not monolithic of course. Not all of us want to kill Obama because he is not a woman. But what issues are important to women? Which party offers more?

McCain might as well win because Senator Obama would have to win by a landslide for President Obama to have the mandate to implement the ideas at Obama dot com. And a landslide is unlikely. More likely the fifty-fifty tie-breaker we've gotten used to for the past two presidential elections.